Rising Above Humanity (part 1)

It's Friday!!!! AND...

I was just thinking...
about last summer...I was attending a Women of Faith conference in Wash. D.C. with my mom, sitting through the last session, listening as each woman bestowed her final words of wisdom upon us. Now, if you've ever been to one of these weekends, or have ever even heard of them-the first few things that come to your mind probably fall along these lines; energy, empowerment, tears, encouragement, laughter, more tears, "awwwwww", more tears, more laughing, bursts of applause, (happy claps, sad claps, "great job" claps", etc.) pink, hearts, pink, and optimism.

Now...I love all of that-because that's women...in a random, emotional, pink nutshell. However, I was suprised to hear a refreshingly honest word from Luci Swindoll. She approached the stage solemnly, armed to warn us concerning the let-downs of life. She offered, "Ladies, life...is profoundly disappointing...live for the 'ah ha' moments...for they make life worthwhile."

Now, what is an 'ah ha' moment exactly? More than a phrase, it's a gasp- it's wishing your eyes could open just a little bit wider to fully take in all that stands before you. It's feeling that for a moment everything is right and peaceful and just. It's a feeling, moment, situation, dream, opportunity, etc. that you would capture in a bottle if you could- for fear that things couldn't possibly get any better.

I learned today...I think maybe more than on any other day...that life can be so bitterly and profoundly disappointing. And, as much as I swore I wouldn't put my faith in people or myself for that matter, I still somehow manage to get tripped up on the mere humanity of...people. I struggle when I see families, supposedly rooted in Christ, falling apart at the seams and every time I feel like I have a little less faith in love and trust and..people. I praise God for that...putting more hope and strength in people than God will always lead to disappointment. I struggle when I feel like there's no way I could ever possibly make everyone happy. I praise God for that...accepting the disappointments of humanity should almost be the foundation for a true, authentic relationship with Christ.

If we're all doing this thing together-that is, trying to live lives modeled after Jesus...from the angle that we are worthless, stained, dishonest, and calloused but for the grace of God-I believe we would be a lot less discouraged by our failures and the unmet expectations of others...and all the more ready to rejoice in eachother's "ah ha" moments. I am learning more and more every day that we're all struggling, we're all angry about one thing or another, we all feel inadequate . Yet, even though we can recognize these traits in ourselves, we're almost suprised when someone else is transparent enough to let us see those traits in them. Does the church really REALLY desire authentic Christianity? I would venture to say that not only do we lack a desire for it so many times, but more often than not we're scared to death of it. We're scared to death that anyone might be as confused as us or struggle over the same issues , and if we can't look to others for spiritual stability, well then...the whole thing will just fall apart...right?

Why is it so hard to accept that at the core of who we are-as mere humans, we are all desperate?Considering the fact that not one of us is God, we have to stop fearing the things in ourselves and others that display inconsistency with the life of Christ-and be on our knees crying out to God-bearing burdens for eachother and again, rejoicing in times when we see glimpses of God's glory displayed in eachother's lives. Let's not waste anymore time putting ourselves on platforms of self-righteousness when we know, that despite loving the Lord, we still falter. How can we then turn and doubt the love of Christ in others as soon as things begin to get a little messy and dare I say...uncomfortable?

Psalm 15:1-3.."O Lord, who may abide in Your tent? Who may dwell on Your holy hill? He who walks with integrity, and works righteousness, and speaks truth in his heart. He does not slander with his tongue, nor does evil to his neighbor, nor takes up reproach against his friend..."

Emc

Honestly?

In the same mind lies clarity and confusion, doubt and faith
and I come before You begging for direction, and seeking Your face...

If I should wait, I'll wait
kneeling and grounded in Your word
but if I should move, I'll move
nothing else can I afford

Than to place my feet in the steps You plan
and to fix my eyes on Your guided path...
I only ask that I not be led astray...
Lord take my hands and guide my way...
restore my sight and grant me Your clarity...

And once again I feel trapped in a skin
with a thousand dreams poisoned by perfectionism
and all I want is to hear Your words above the noise,
"This is the way, walk in it...that's the sound of My voice."

So if I should wait, I'll wait
kneeling and grounded in Your word
but if I should move, I'll move
nothing else can I afford

I only ask that I not be led astray...
Holy God lend the hand that guides the way
restore my sight and grant me Your

CLARITY

Something to Chew On...

Hello Again!

Well...we're about to close up our first week of classes at Liberty. Honestly...it was a little rough coming back from break. My family means the world to me and so time at home is so precious. Regardless...back to the grind now.

It's interesting...I'm just now realizing that it seems as though God teaches me something so new every semester-or, something so familiar, and something happens that finally brings it to absorbtion. Sometimes the lesson dawns on me at the end, where I look back and say, "ok...now I get it..." and things that confused me at the beginning come to light and all the pieces come together. Other times-I get a pretty big gulp for starters-and then have the remaining months of the semester to fully digest. I think this spring will be one of those.

Through a pretty big recent situation, I realized that as much as I try to encourage others to just trust God at all times, when it really comes down to the application -I do just the opposite-I go into panic mode, put on my work gloves, and go into problem-solver super-fix-it mode. As much as I hate to admit-what this really says is, "Ok God-this one's really big...no...really, REALLY big and I'm just not sure you're going to work it out (the way I think it should work out) and so I'm just gonna go ahead and take this into my own hands just to make sure everything ends well (I get my way)." Yikes.

How many of us could ever directly say that to God? Not many. But how many of us would reflect that through our actions in stressful situations? Probably most. Most of us would probably have to admit that we don't truly trust God as we ought. Most of us would probably admit that we end up "helping" a little by taking matters into our own hands.

Again..."perfect love casts out all fear"...it always seems to come back to the extent of God's love for us. If we truly trust that He loves us-why do we still act out of fear? Why do we lose sleep over situations we have absolutely no control over? Why do we constantly belittle the power of God and His sovereignty?

"There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear; because fear involves punishment, and the one who fears is not perfected in love." 1 John 4:18

Why is it that I only began to fully trust God after exhausting all other options? Why is it that it took falling to my knees in desperation to fully surrender everything? Since when did the God of the universe become a last resort?!

I decided this year I would make weekly resolutions rather than yearly-it's just a little less ominous to set short term goals-and then it feels like more has been accomplished when the goals are met...a little less self-defeating.

My #1 resolution for this week (and ambitiously all weeks to follow forever after)
-fall before the feet of the ultimate mender in and for all things...
Luke 18:41-"What do you want Me to do for you?"And he said, "Lord, I want to regain my sight!"

The Lord granted the man His sight because he prayed a bold prayer-He presented a request before God. Now, God doesn't always promise to heal, comfort, or intervene the way we would prefer-and it's a good thing ;) He does, however, promise to hear our prayers, offered in faith, and answer us-if we are faithful to listen and wait...and when we get impatient with that...listen and wait some more.

"Open the gates, that the righteous nation may enter, the one that remains faithful. The steadfast of mind You will keep in perfect peace, because he trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for in God the Lord, we have an everlasting rock." -Isaiah 26:2-4

em